Nourishing the seeds

I have been reading a book, lent out by a friend of mine, for over the past six months.

It's not one of them, you read in one go.  It's more of a dip in, dip out book.

It talks about nourishing seeds in your life.  Basically doing things that are good for you and give you a positive feeling about life. 

The three recommendations in the book are:

1. Be with people who value your opinion

2. Be with people who view the world positively

3. Go somewhere you get recognized.

Simple and also kind of obvious really. 

Yet as I look back on my year, especially professionally, I realize when all three were at play, I was really much happier. And when one of these was not present, I can say I realized the difference. Fundamentally I felt imbalanced and dissatisfied. 

So as I go into 2014, I will consciously remember these three points and if not in place, I will change some thing til they are.  

Do they resonate with you?

Did you always have the three present?

How did you feel when one of them was not present?

Maybe these are not relevant for you and you have different ones.

Either way, the simplicity and clarity works for me.

It's not what you do between Christmas and New year that matters

It's not what you do between Christmas and New year that matters, it's what you do between New Year and Christmas.

It's such a great expression and holds such truth. 

Clearly it helps in allowing yourself to indulge in the seasonal festivities including the extra mince pie, the last few ferrero rochers and that pint to go with lunch at the pub. 

And I have to say I am loving it. 

Especially as I do work hard and exercise the rest of the year. 

Now it would be naive to just go crazy and go to excesses, but it does feel good to indulge that little bit more and do that little bit less exercise. 

It's good for the soul too. 

However the fun phase expires in a few days and the hard work begins once again. 

However have a think about it and see if it means anything to you at all. 

I liked it. 

I wish I was bald

Today as we were out walking, the wind was whipping around us.

My daughters have long hair and it was getting blown all over the place.

I said to my oldest, that on our return to Grandma's house, she will need to jump in the shower and wash her hair.

She then turned to me and said. "You are so lucky, I wish I was bald, like you. Then I would not have to wash my hair"

After laughing, I then realized that I had made being bald acceptable for my kids, even better aspirable and enviable.

Brilliant!

Christmas Day

Too much telly

Too much to eat

Too little movement

Too many presents

I think that is purely an adult view!

I don't think for one minute, my kids would agree with any of that!

Merry Christmas 2013.

With seasons greetings, I wish you too much too!
BBB
Xxxx

I am rich! I have tissues.

What is your definition of "rich" or "well off"?

For some people it is when they don't have to check their bank balance before making a purchase, for others it is when they own their own house. Maybe it is when you have your dream car.

However everyone has their own definition.  It is very personal.

It also changes over time.

What it was, when you were six, is fundamentally different, from when you were a teenager. Then a decade later it changes again.

My friend recently reminded me what my definition was, when I was a late teen.  My vision of rich was to have a packet of tissues in each of my coat pockets, rather than toilet roll.

That was it.

I really viewed tissue packets as indulgent and a sign of financial success.

So in my terms I am now rich and actually have been for a while now.

So what is your definition of richness? Have you reached it?

What about your earlier definitions?

Are you even conscious of how you measure it today?

Clearly being financially well off is not an articulated vision for everyone, but I am thrilled that I have met my goal and have an abundance of tissue packets in my pockets.  I have not ventured into buying the super soft aloe-vera, menthol smelling version, so there is still room to be ostentatious! But for now I am happy?

You?

A lot happens in 7 years

I am lucky to have a fine group of friends. They maybe dispersed all over the world, but they are magnificent.

One particular group meets only once or twice a year now, but when we do come together it is lovely. As one friend said, the time just flies by, it's like everything else stops, when we get chatting.

This weekend, we were all together again.

We talked about how we got together in the first place and how our lives were, way back then.

We then started to list what had happened in those 7/8 years. Boy, was it a long list. Full of significant life events.

When it came to my turn, I produced my list of events. My list included babies, country moves, house purchases etc.

One thing that I completey forget to mention, was that I had lost my hair in these years.

I truly and genuinely had forgetten that this had also happened.

WOW !

How was I able to forget that?

Part of me was shocked that I had omitted to mention, that I had gone from long thick, brown, flowing hair to baldness. Yet part of me was pleased that I did not define the past 7/8 years of my life by my alopecia.

It was one of my friends who had to remind me.

So what has happened to you over the last seven years? Is there something in that time, that you have forgotten about, something that really has been life significant, yet somehow it is not.

I am still shocked that I did not mention my alopecia. But a piece of me is really proud, that I do not view my baldness in that way and that I consider other events in my life far more important.

Travelling naked

The title may be a litle misleading, but that is at least how I felt over the last few days.

I was out on a business trip and due to the full agenda, I decided not to take my laptop.

Smart phones really do a lot of the work.

However on the train, on the flight and in the hotel, I felt naked. My reaction until now, has always been to open up the laptop and work. However without it, what on earth does a girl do??

So this is what I did.

I read half a book! Yes really, over 200 pages.

I took at 30 minute shower. This is about 5 times longer than my usual length.

I looked out of the window.

Nice choices eh?

The downside was that I really felt nervous that I could not access thos encrypted emails, nor could I prepare some of the tasks that needed doing. Worst of all, was that I could not post any blogs!!!!

So sorry for the delay to those of you who religiously check my site on Monday, Wednesday and Friday. In the future I will be more organized or go back to dragging the heavy black box around, just so I can honour my blog committments :-)

But it was a nice change having a lighter bag and actually having to think how I will spend my time!

What habits have you changed recently?

How did it work for you?

The sport of collecting

I do like a bargain.

And I know many of my friends do too. You know who you are out there!

Whether it is buy-one-get-one-free at the supermarket or a money off coupon for the cinema, I love it it. It's like free money or a free upgrade.

Even at work they have a system, where if you collect stamps at the cash desk, you get your 11th coffee free.

I just love it. It is a sport. I would go as far as to say that it is an art.

I remember my mum making me find all the money off coupons in the newspapers and getting me to cut them out.  She would would then use them at the till and end up getting lots of money off our grocery bill. Smart lady!

Then there was the breakfast cereal tokens. If you collected enough of them, you could get music cassettes or even a world atlas. My dad and I still argue who the atlas belongs to. I say me, because I cut out all the tokens and sent them off. He says him, as he paid for the breakfast cereal. I still think its mine Dad, and I know you are reading!!!

Do you collect coupons? Do you cheap thrills by a half price Big Mac? Or are you rather mortified when I bring out the newspaper clipping from my purse?

Do tell?

Any offers out there I should know about?

Please share!

When I heard you wore a wig, I was glad!

This comment was so wonderful.

"When I heard  you wore a wig, I was glad!"

The context is really important and it reminded me of the importance of vulnerability and telling people about what is going on beneath the surface.

I was talking to an old friend who I had not seen for many years. We began talking very easily and freely about my hair or lack of it. She had many questions.

Shortly after this, she said, "You know what,  I was glad when I heard, that what you had on your head was not real."  What a strange comment. I had never heard anyone say this before.

And she went on to explain. She said that she sick of my hair always looking so perfect and in place, when the rest of us struggle with volume and roots!

How funny!

What a cute thing to say.

How beautifully honest.

And I had never thought about it from that persepective.

It also reminded me of the value of vulnerability. Had I not talked about this or shared with her that I wore a wig, I might have just irritated her unintenionally. I am glad that I am imperfect. I am glad that I am human too and I am glad that I told her.

So there you have it readers, once again a reminder, that it is good to share our imperfections, as if we don't, we maybe pushing people away, rather than pulling them in.  And let's face it, we need all the help we can get some times!!

Housemen

There is a club here in the city which is solely there for "housemen".

There is no clear definition of what a houseman is, but typically it is the non-working husband of the working wife, and often the people are english speaking. But I don't really want to categorise them, as they really do come in many forms.

They meet at lunch once a week and bring with them dogs and children.

Every few years, I have gone along, just so I can see for myself this wonderful group of people. I always get a warm welcome, although these lunchers are strictly for men.

The conversation was so insightful, I was next to a Canadian medical expert, who talked about his first few months in this foreign country and how he wished he had found the group earlier to help his assimilation into the country, the other guy was new from the US, a legal expert, and was talking about the joy and the frustrations, he was having in helping the family set up and spending time with the children and wondering what the future would hold for his career.

It was a rich conversation, full of tips and support. Plently of laughter and a few pints were shared.

Support groups of any nature are so important to society and I know from listenting to the stories, that this particular group, has been a welcome lifeline to many.

It was a great lunch and I was, once again, impressed by this fabulous bunch of men from all over the world.

Thanks for having me on Wednesday and I say, three cheers for the housmen!

Going back to who you are

There is something quite wonderful about going back to your roots.

I was lucky enough to be able to do that last week with two of my "old" friends.

These are two of the friends I grew up with, roller skating with, playing hide and seek with, planning our futures with and probably at some point planning to marry each other!  One lived next door and the other in the next village.

We built dens together, had sleepovers, played monopoly and simply spent hours and hours just being together. On our bikes or in each others bedrooms. We never tired of each others company.

These two girls now women, were the foundation of my youth. They are what form my memories of my early childhood, my very happy childhood. In fact neither of them went to my school, we all went to different ones. This may in fact have helped the friendship flourish.

We knew each others parents, each others siblings, and each others houses. Who can say that nowadays about their friends?

So on meeting them last week, one on Wednesday and the other on Friday, I was reminded of their fabulousness!

We realized that although years have passed, that our lifes were so intertwined, we knew things of each others families, that no other friends would ever have known (or even dare to ask). Between us we had had our fare share of life events, and it was a sad moment when we realised we had not always shared them and been there for each other, but there was a clear understanding of why this had happened and absolutely no bitterness or judgement.

It was just sheer joy.

Both get togethers were good for the soul.

On my journey home, I reflected that it was really important to connect back with the past and those important people in our lives. Regardless of how long there has been no contact. It's never too late.

Friendships like these are timeless and although I have not always nourished these relationships and  kept in touch, it was like yesterday all over again.

Is there someone out there you need to get in touch with?

Someone who's presence will nourish your soul?

Go on reach out..... I tell you, today I am still running on the energy gained.

Thank you my childhood buddies, it was lovely to see you again.

It's about ability not disability

I was able to particpitate in an event at work recently, called Diversability.

The subject really interested me and I fought fiercely to protect this time in my calendar.

I was so pleased I went.

It really was an awareness raiser, where a panel talked about their disability and how it affected them at work. One man had a disease that did not allow him to smile. His face muscles did not work due to a rare disorder. He talked about how people thought he was miserable and an idiot.
He clearly was neither.

However despite his inability to smile with his mouth, this man was smiling, with his shoulders, his hands and his eyes.

Another lady talked about having two disabled children and how that impacted her work. Yet she talked about her acquired skill to not pigeon hole people and put them in a box, as she saw that everyone is capable of great things and we should never assume.What a wonderful skill.

My link to alopecia today is that maybe, just maybe, someone with alopecia could of been on that stage. Maybe just maybe it could be me.

What triggered this thought is when one of the panel was asked, "Do you tell people about your disability?" and the answer was "Yes, of course, why hide it?"

Indeed, why hide it?

Why hide it?

Why hide it?

Nail varnish - a national threat

Recently a parcel was sent to us. Well apparently it was.

You see we don't really know, as we never received it.

It was intercepted on the way to Switzerland and sent back to the UK.

So the sheer joy of receiving a letter and a parcel was denied to us.

This in itself is bad enough and frustrating for the sender, but it gets worse.
The goods inside were seen as illegal and hazardous, so as a result, were removed and destroyed.

So what were these dangerous goods heading their way across Europe.

NAIL VARNISH!!

I ask you, really?????????????

The postal service and customs people were kind enough to inform the sender of the reasons.

Here is the pamphlet.

On reading, it is clear that you can send:

 - Guns
 - Live creatures
 - Drugs for scientific purposes

But no pretty pink kids nail varnish and nail stickers. That is just a threat to national security.

Sigh.

At least my friend and I had a good laugh over it, and maybe just maybe there is a customs officer with glittery stickers on their nails, which would at least mean some pleasure was derived from the gift.

So be warned, read the small print before sending gifts overseas!!!

As fast as my little legs would carry us

A year ago, a friend of mine posted on Facebook that she had ran the annual "CityRun" of 5.5km through the Swiss city she lived in. She posted such a festive and happy photo that I felt obliged to say that this time next year I would run with her!! Easy to say when you are 6000 km away!

So a year later, having moved half way across the world, the time came to come good on my promise.
I signed up for the run. Under a little coercion and reminders from my dear friend.

The weather was beautiful, cold but crisp. Perfect for a run round our beautiful city.

All the Christmas lights were on, the crowds were out and with a few preparatory runs under our belt, we were feeling great!

I have posted before about my sporting tendencies, namely that I have them, but I can be a little lazy when it comes to the execution. I tend to hold back, cut corners and seek out breaks. I like to preserve my energy, just in case. I mean you never know, you might get chased by a lion on the way home.

However my lovely friend, is a little different.

She gives it some. She gives it her all in fact. She does not hold back.

So following the starting gun, she dragged me round the circuit, knees high, breathing fast and going as fast as our little legs would carry us.

This in itself was fine, however when the crowds roared and shouted us on, we naturally picked up our pace. The power of motivation was impressive. There was a direct link.

I tell you, I felt the pace change to our usual lunch time jog along the river.

But we made it, and how the crowds cheered, just for us!

I think it had everything to do with the fact that we were wearing santa hats and reindeer antlers! Even the local free press showed an interest.

Where do I sign up for next year???