Roses and Scones

One of my closest and longest friends came for a visit this weekend. She had not been to my house for about 10 years. Seems mad but it's true.
So what did we do??

Well this might make you laugh........
We baked scones together.



Yup that was our highlight and believe me there was a few to chose from!

Not only were they fantastic, but the process in how we got there, covered everything about why we had become and still remain friends.

We love the same things
We have the same values
We appreciate each others strengths
We mock each others deficiencies
We listen to each others ideas
We want to learn from each others experiences
We allow the other to take the lead when they are most passionate
We allow ourselves to be wrong
We don't care about how we come across - we just are our raw selves
We appreciate the good of life
We are grateful


and all that in making a batch of scones.

There is a lot to be said about growing up together and knowing where each other has come from.
And this weekend my girls got to enjoy a part of that. And how they enjoyed it.

The roses were bought whilst shopping for the ingredients, but the roses are special in ways beyond the flower.



Friends are magic as are roses.

Good bye to some wonderful memories

It was a regular Thursday evening and I got home at around 6.30. I knew the family would be out, as they had had to nip out last minute for something.

I did my usual thing on entry and called out to them as I entered just in case they were back. Nothing. Still and quiet. As I got into the living room, the door to the garden was open, it was a little unusual but given the kids run in and out all the time, I just cursed them under my breath and closed it over.

I quickly got on with my planned call and thought nothing of it. Pottering and chatting away down the phone for the next half an hour. The family arrived back shortly after and the evening began.

Hubbie was less tolerant of the door being left open and set to find out who and why this had happened. It quickly transpired that no one had been out. Oh well I thought, another one of those things with no explanations. However Hubbie smelt a rat. After going out into the garden, he found footprints from the fence into the house. Someone had broken in.

I was shocked. Must have been kids, breaking in but they had took nothing and there were no footprints so we had gotten off or?

Well a quick look into the drawers, cupboards and secret hideouts confirmed, we had been burgled. Anything of any value had been taken. Although they had disturbed nothing, infact so much so I had not noticed. They had left PC's, iPads etc, and gone straight for sources of money and jewelry. And bingo they had found it. Why oh why were my valuables in such obvious places.

To cut a long story short, they had clearly been careful and purposeful and had not wanted us to notice they had been in, however I guess I had disturbed them, hence the door being left open. Wow! It also transpired they had only had 23 minutes to conduct their business.

So whilst we are deeply saddened with the event, they had not trashed our house, took everything of value. They even left my wedding ring on my night desk. My naivety thought it was them being nice (yeah right) but someone quickly pointed out that it was engraved thus not of interest to such professional thiefs. Well whatever the reason, I am thankful for them leaving that.

So what have I learned.
1. Take photos of your valuables so the police have a chance of finding them.
2. Do not store your valuables in your bedside cabinet.
3. If there is something suspicious, don't ignore it, trust your instincts.
4. It is "only" money. They did not hurt us.

So on wards and upwards and hear is hoping, that they got what they wanted and now will stop...........

The final planning

Following a conversation with some good friends, one subject has been on my mind.

Funeral planning. Yup sounds morbid. But actually when there is no reason to be thinking of it, it is more of a fun exercise, there is no heaviness involved as the reality seems a whole lifetime away.

As we were lightly chatting about funeral planning we were all aligned that these ceremonies should honour the wishes of the deceased. We felt any service or ceremony should be a reflection of the personality and style of the person who had passed.

Yet unless explicit wishes have been left about how the event should be conducted, isn't it impossible to know exactly what the wishes of the deceased would be?

So it led us to agree that we should all have a plan for our own funerals and to keep it in a safe place, to be found at the right time.

There are many things to be considered, the music, the speakers, the tone, the location and the food and drink of course!

So here are my thoughts:

1. I would want a few speakers, people who knew me best. Their words need to be honest, real and they should tell stories that make people smile and chuckle. Not too embarrassing but I guess the best stories might need to be! I trust you here guys.
2. I would want a moment, where people laughed out loud and had a strong memory of the person who I was.
3. There would maybe be a song that people associated with me, maybe one that I danced crazy to at a party once. Not sure what the song would be.
4. Location is a tricky one, but right now I would have to plunge for my home city in Switzerland.
5. Ashes, well given I am a pragmatic and practical person I would like to also be that in my passing, so I would like my ashes to be scattered on the tomatoes at the bottom of the garden. I am not sure even if this is allowed, but again to honour me, I would encourage those of you left to make the choice, to do it anyway and pretend you never knew there were such regulations :-) Blame it on me!
6. Also there would need to be a gathering afterwards, it would have to be somewhere I liked to go, not too stuffy and dull, and there needs to be good wine served and actually a few mojitos would not got a miss.
7. And definitely crisps. Tons of salt and vinegar crisps, ideally Walkers and not the Swiss ones by Lays - they are not vinegary enough.
8. And finally, I want everyone there. No excuses. I will leave a sum of money for the travel fund, so remember to remind those who are sorting out my finances that I wrote that here!!

So these are my first thoughts, I might need to deepen them a little.

Anything I have missed or could add to make the thinking more complete.

Is there something you have ever thought about?

Do let me know........

What are your big rocks?

This week most people are back to work or school and schedules and routines kick back in. I am finding getting out of bed so hard so far, my eyes burn and refuse to open for at least 10 minutes of being awake. That said, within days it will become usual again as the holiday relaxed state fades into the background. Sigh!


However this week has been marvelous in many ways. It has been a little quieter than usual, and it has offered up a little time to reconnect with friends over lunch and coffee and in my case, quiet time at my desk to plan in breaks throughput the year, ensure time for holidays is blocked and ensure the important stuff gets planned.


It seems that others have been doing this too. As one friend quoted, this week has been about putting the big rocks in.


She reminded me of the story


http://www.appleseeds.org/big-rocks_covey.htm




So what are your big rocks? Are they in?
What about that project? That girls weekend? That play you wanted to book?


I reckon by Friday the slot for doing this has gone, so what is stopping you?

Trial run hair day

Wearing wigs needs a bit of planning.


As I wear synthetic ones and not real hair ones, they need to be frequently replaced. I change them about every 4 months. That way they always look fresh and perky, rather than tired and flat. And when I go to the hairdressers to get a new one, I tend to pick up two or three, so I never have to be in a last minute panic to chose a new one.


As I change the styles all the time, as well as the colours, I always take the opportunity of the holiday break to make the switch. Over the years I have also learned not to wear a wig for the first time on a long work day.


Wigs are a bit like new shoes, they may feel good in the shop, but once you are out and about, you notice them rubbing your heels or squeezing your toes, so like new shoes, its good to break your wig in slowly and see how it feels once you are out of the shop and walking down the high street.


So yesterday I took my wig for its trial day out.


I needed to check if it was too tight, to see if the fringe fell into my eyes, to check if it itches or slips. There are lots of possible pain points and its best to know what they are when you are in a safe environment so you can quickly make the changes needed if you can. That could include cutting some strands, wearing a hairband underneath to keep it snug on the head or having a hair grip close at hand to force down those pesky stray hairs.


So how did it do?


Well apart from it being quite bouffy and puffy on the top, it fared well. Its a keeper.


So now we are ready for the work year to commence!

And the 2016 word is.........

DARE
I have thought long and hard about my word for the new year. I take my word very seriously as it can become a compass at times when I need a form of guidance. Also when I commit to something I tend to take action and ensure I live up to the intent. So whatever word I take, I have to be willing to live up to it!


I have played with a few ideas.


Dance


Light


Breathe


Chill


Stable


Kind


I have had a few conversations with lovely friends to hear their words and to bounce off mine. I have heard:


Mindful


Courage


Belief


Expectationless


Present


Calm


Compass


Moments (love this one!)


And after these conversations and my morning reflections whilst lying lazily I bed, I have landed with DARE.


I have to confess, I have a nervousness with the word. I am a little scared of it if I am honest. As I really don't know where it can lead me and what trouble it can get me it. Does it mean that I am daring myself to make the controversial decision, maybe it is about daring to be honest, daring to change a plan, daring to live into my future self, daring to write a book, daring to go to new places, daring to do the unexpected, daring to live up to my capabilities, daring to do what I want to do, daring to go bald, daring to wear my headscarf at work, daring to express all the emotions I feel. Just taking one step further and being a little more daring.


If I take this word, I have to confess I don't know what it will bring. Stable, my word of 2015, was easy to imagine, but Dare is very different. Dare is exciting and scary.


So I will let you know how it works for me and you let me know how yours works for you.


Have a great start to what promises to be a wonderful year.

December High and January Blues?

The end of the year is always a wonderful time. In fact December is so packed with activities and things to do that the whole month is a whir of excitement. As a planner, I am in my element in December as I plan for dinner parties, friends gifts, Christmas and New Year events etc. I thrive on the adrenalin.

So when December is over, I often feel a sadness as it feels likes it all over.

The sadness I just felt now. All the fun events that I had been looking forward to for so long, had now happened, all those moments with friends and family had happened and we're now just memories. January 1st is a day that marks the era of new beginnings, for me however January always starts with a moment of sadness.

Anyone else get that feeling? The January 1st blues.

And then.......it all starts to turn around.

I start thinking about the new events coming up, the annual traditions that lie ahead, the February school holidays which are only 5 weeks away, the friends I want to invite over for dinner, the nights out already in the calendar, books I am going to read. Then I start to remember that each month has its own magic. Each season brings its own personality and its own set of activities. The snow, the first warm day of Spring, lazy Summer days, the garden blooming and the circle of life just keeps on going.

So whilst I am sad that 2015 has gone and all the fun festive parties are over, I do feel so glad to have had them all. Full of gratitude that I have felt that love and friendship so many times, that I have laughed with many, been relied on by many and sought out help from many.

2015 was good to me and December was full of magic.

So I will embrace the sadness as I know it will pass very quickly.