Pulling my hair out

If I had any, I would pull my hair out.

I feel like I am constantly screaming at my kids. Over the last few days, they can do nothing right. And me, well I am the mother from hell.

I can reel of a list of things, just to paint the picture: wearing dirty boots in the house, constantly interrupting my only few minutes of privacy, namely on the loo, getting Nutella on their sleeves, always asking to watch TV. Not forgetting the permanent fighting with each and telling tales about what each of them are doing wrong.

They want everything they see when we are walking past shops, new pens, magazines, toys, even shoes. They sulk, they say mean things, they are driving me insane.

I have read enough to understand, that I am most likely contributing to this behaviour with mine. But this time I am not getting this theory. Yet, this morning I decided I would give it a huge effort. We were going to have a good day. So I planned a nice trip to the zoo, something they have been asking to do for a few weeks, and I even thought we could stay for lunch. Nice treat right?

This had to be a good plan, fresh air, physical activity and stimulation galore. But it clearly isn't enough for these demanding and right now, damn annoying offspring.

I have in my sheer loss of the situation just sat down, really calmly I add, with my 10 year old and asked her how I can make her day better and what we can both do to ensure I don't shout at her and am not too bossy, so we both get to enjoy our day.

It was a good conversation, with some good ideas, yet in minutes I was (obviously not literally) tearing my hair out again. Aghhh!
I am exasperated.

Is this normal? Have I raised two monsters? Do I need help?
As a last resort, how about this;

"Two kids for sale, any takers??"